Courage is a big Word…

Monica Iphone 160Hola all!

I see life and it’s passin’ right before my eyes
And the past is the past don’t regret it, time to realize
I need to walk on the wire just to catch my breath,
I don’t know how or where but I’m goin’ it’s all that I have left

I was watching yet another movie today, I’m guilty of procrastinating lately, more than necessary, although I like to watch oldies but goodies and we all can agree that Top Gun is a classic, I remember when I watched it I thought the intimate scenes where kind of porn-ish lol… now days that’s nothing, times have changes!!

 I am going it’s all I have left…. Things changes, sometimes so fast that it’s hard to keep up with it, we change, the circumstances changes and sometimes we feel like we are losing control it’s hard to catch our breath. I found my compass and I have a plan, but sometimes the execution of that plan is a bit tricky, because of the constant change that is life, there are things that you can not control and it’s hard to not be able to move all the pieces the way you want.

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Long time ago I decided to live with courage and since that moment I have taken decisions and paths with faith but with the full commitment to live up to that new name… but I have also discovered that “Courage” is a big word and it won’t work alone you not only need courage, you need faith, passion, motivation, and discipline among other things, and sometimes you might need failure or setbacks to make that Courage word not just a word in a dictionary but a lifestyle…

I am still in that process, I have lost a couple of battles before, but I have never lost the positivism and when I look back in my life,  I am proud of the accomplishments, the victories, I think the setbacks and the losses were too small when I compare then to my accomplishments, I don’t want to sound like I am bragging, I don’t like that I have done it once or twice, and I always get a very humbling lesson later on ;/, but I have always been proud to consider myself a successful woman, I have always been proud to think about myself like someone who fight for what she wants and accomplish all that I set my mind on, and proud of not given up under challenges, I know I am smart and intelligent, I believe in me, and that what have made all the difference…

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This past year and half I’ve been trying to open doors, search options that will take me closer to my permanent goal, I’ve been knocking on doors for a while now, it feels like forever,  and even the small doors are not easy to open, I have a career that I am good at it, people can make you feel the opposite sometimes, competition is rough, and it’s hard to take it.  I am guilty of forgetting that in all my previous success, there was also trial, fail, moments of doubts  and moments when all look blurry and that’s why those successful moments made me so proud… I have forgotten that more than once…

During time of changes it’s very easy to start self doubting, to surrender under the challenges, and accept defeat with a feeling of failure, to be positive with everyone else, and give positive advice to everyone else but myself which makes me feel like some kind of a fraud, how can I talk about positivism and not living like that, but I guess is also part of the path is part of the challenge and the fight for my goal.

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 I guess I am not embracing failure, I am not a failure, I know that,  I am just accepting that I have lost some battles recently,  and I probably will lose some more in time, I am accepting that I lost direction at some point and let people made me feel like I don’t have what it takes, so therefore I surrender myself to the circumstances,  don’t know if you ever feel like this… I think I am accepting that even though I found my compass, and come up with ideas to keep going, I still need to focus on the execution, on living that plan everyday, accepting setbacks and changes but instead of loosing motivation, faith and give up discipline, I have to take them as the complement of my future accomplishments.!

At the end all changes can be good, can lead us to a better us and to better circumstances, it all depend on how we deal with them. I think what make it difficult is that it forces us to adjust and to change ourselves, well every night I made an act of faith, I go to sleep with the confidence that I will wake up the next morning,  we made simple act of faith everyday and every moment, so if I can take that simple act and move from that I can adjust to any change, I can make a bigger acts of faith with the confident that I am walking by faith not by sight, that I have the motivation because this it’s what I want for my life,  I have a family that believes in me, and specially because I can move the bigger piece of all, myself, and I can do what I set to do and nobody but me have power over that!!

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I walk baby steps, but not because I am not ready for big one, I believe in myself,  but because I know that all what we do even if are small actions are part of the big picture, are part of the leaning process that will lead me to my goal,  to a better tomorrow!

See a chance gotta take it wanna meet my fate
‘Cause the last thing I ever wanted was to find out it’s too late
No way out when you’re in it deeper than the night
There’s a light at the end of the tunnel and I see it burning bright…

Thanks for reading, dreams and goals require changes and as the song says, ” I don’t know how or where but I’m goin’ it’s all that I have left…” so let’s keep going!! If you want to leave a comment I’ll be happy to read it :)

Besitos!

Pictures, thanks to weit, and mine too. Video from Youtube.com user TouchOfTheEighties
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About Monica

I am a Journalist by vocation and determination, walking by faith not by sight, love sports, crazy about Futbol but mostly I love life! :)
This entry was posted in Dreams and goals, Life, Motivation, Personal, Professional and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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